I didn’t write yesterday because I was exhausted and dizzy and sneezing and fighting the Covid rash that covers my hands and makes me want to slice off my skin with a razor.
I’m sleeping 12 hours a day with The Norse Pride curled up against me like good little nurses and Nala, the naughty cockatoo, breaking dishes that are heavier than she is.
The foster kittens urinated in my underwear drawer. The cool new jean-looking leggings with the pockets that I got at the thrift store for work came out of the wash with a giant bleach stain on the butt. The electric bill came— and last November and December it was $55 each month. The new bill is $130.
I started the day sneezing and even more dizzy than yesterday. And when I blew my nose it was equal parts snot and blood.
So it looks like today might be similar to yesterday— I watched all of Ink Master season 1 yesterday. Today I’ll watch season 2.
But the happy news— Facebook alerted me to a message sent to me last month from Zeus & Apollo’s FURRever mom. So we had a conversation this morning about how they are doing.
Zeus has become a cuddly mama’s girl and Apollo loves his new brother Butter. I’m told Apollo is getting very tall. And Zeus still chirps and cuddles.
This is really a good amount of fun for me, but as we got Vale into the sweater we got a text that my dear cat-loving former world colleague was bringing her homemade egg nog.
The teenager has taken a liking to eggnog, but as of most of the younger generations, she’s never had the real thing.
I had had some fruitcake for breakfast— her great-grandmother’s recipe made by my mother-in-law. My in-laws have a really delicious fruit add. I brought some to work last year for Mr. Accordion and he shared it with the office Christmas party, a decision he make have regretted.
And now this.
And I used some more of Bill’s gift card to order wings from Deux Wings on GrubHub. I am not a fan of wings, but the teenager is. I rather enjoyed the mac and cheese and amazing French fries.
From Deux Wings, great food
On TV today, I started My Mad Fat Diary and Ink Master.
I received my diagnosis this morning, after realizing on Wednesday that the symptoms I had attributed to my everyday health problems.
9 p.m.: after spending most of the day in bed, I finish Netflix’s The Crown and start Hillbilly Elegy because I see Glenn Close is in it.
10 p.m. I turn out my light and go to bed early, struggling to get comfortable because of the muscle and joint pain.
Saturday, December 12, 2020
2 a.m. I wake up, can’t get back to sleep. I play on my phone. I close my eyes and imagine myself drawing healing energy out of the cosmos and suddenly a vision of ocean waves floods me.
Around 3 a.m. I fall asleep again
8 a.m. I wake. I need to pee. But the way my body feels, the walk to the bathroom seems impossible. And I know once I walk out my door, the cats will want food.
8:30 a.m. I return to my room after using the bathroom. The kittens escape. I leave the door open so they can return and cats come in and out.
9 a.m. Some friends text to see how I’m doing. I respond and now I’m exhausted and need a rest.
9:30 a.m. the teenager is up. I asked if she can bring me coffee after I rest. She says sure.
10 a.m. I rest and she brings coffee. And my medicine.
10:30 a.m. I finish the coffee and engage in a Facebook discussion about Covid, sparked by a friend who chastises those who don’t wear masks and don’t want to abide by the mandate of no indoor gatherings. Sobaka’s mom offers to get me groceries at Shoprite. I ask for coffee.
11:00 a.m. I shower and feel human again briefly. I am grateful for these new soap products that contain eucalyptus. My other neighbor texts she is at Dunkin and wants to know my order.
11:15 a.m. I discover one of my closest friends has symptoms of Covid but hadn’t received his test results. I feel awful convinced he got it from me, but he assures me we might have gotten it from the same place. Now he has to cancel his surgery that was scheduled for Monday.
11:30 a.m. I’ve annoyed the teenager. I’m watching the cats frolic and check on the neighbor who came over for coffee earlier in the week. Her son left her home because he’s afraid I exposed them.
11:45 a.m. The teenager is chastising me for having an absurd method of organizing my tea. I’m going out to the porch to wait for my Dunkin’.
12 Dunkin arrives. I go back to bed with Kittens and a sugarplum macchiato
12:30 p.m. more texting with friends, despite large macchiato am feeling fatigued. Watching the cockatoo pick through the leftover parakeet food I gave her.
12:50 p.m. done uploading YouTube videos. Debating watching TV versus napping like the kittens. Kitten video: Loki And Vale play
1 p.m. I decide to curl up and nap like my foster kittens. They snuggle up to me but as a side sleeper I find it impossible to get comfortable. As I face my left, my right hip, knee and even ankle burn. I roll onto my back and it feels like every vertebrae in my spine is protruding. I lie still and wait for everything to calm down. My knee is the only thing that refuses to settle.
1:10 pm I’m restless (probably from the caffeine). I remember my neighbor is out grocery shopping with my credit card and that I should have my ringer on in case she encounters a problem. several friends are texting— one had symptoms like mine and is still waiting on her Covid results. The cats are laying on me as if to force me to sleep.
Another friend texts and mentions egg nog and I am excited that my former colleague is making some homemade egg nog and bringing me a quart or two. My knee still burns as does my right sinus under my eye. I need to pee.
1:15 p.m. headed to the bathroom. The birds are oddly still.
1:25 p.m. I watch more of Hillbilly Elegy. There are some intense scenes of drug abuse, domestic violence and child abuse.
1:45 p.m. the teenager brings me some Twizzlers left over from Halloween, I ask her to let the cockatoo out for a few minutes, and my dad calls to check on me.
1:50 p.m. watching more of Hillbilly Elegy. I can’t believe Glenn Close’s performance. She’s magnificent. The older she gets the more beautiful she is. The kittens sleep at my feet. The cockatoo sits nicely on my chest.
2:30 p.m. I finished the movie, which is based on a memoir of the same name. No wonder some of the scenes were so disturbing— real life is often more painful than anything the mind can make up. My cockatoo keeps dozing off.
2:40 p.m. time to use the bathroom again and see if I can get this sleepyhead bird to go to her cage.
2:50 p.m. Sobaka’s mom is at McDonald’s so I try to place a mobile order but the GPS on my phone knows I’m still at home so the McDonald’s app is fighting with me. Gives me a funky code. It really is amazing what one can do from a sick bed with a credit card.
2:55 p.m. sneezing again. Forgot my tissues downstairs
3 p.m. watching some YouTube videos while the teenager finishes vacuuming and cleaning her room.
3:15 p.m. we received our McDonald’s order and our groceries. I distributed food to the teens by dropping it outside their bedroom doors. You can tell Sobaka’s mom isn’t a coffee drinker because she bought the cutest little can of coffee. She bought us orange juice with extra vitamin C and zinc! Now that is thinking! She also got me a big old chunk of raspberry coffee cake.
3:20 p.m. In trying to get the groceries into the kitchen and the food to the kids, I forget that our cat Fog shot past me onto the sunporch.
3:50 p.m. After watching Canadian dietician Abbey Sharp’s review of Kelly Ripa’s diet, I lie down for a nap. Instantly the kittens start playing and my feet become civilian casualties.
4 p.m. The teenager comes into my room to chastise me about the cat. Apparently the Christmas tree (which was unbalanced and the two teens had tried to stabilize it with a rope tied to a plant hanger) is now on the floor. I’m sorry, but the reality is that I don’t care.
4:05 p.m. I don’t think it’s even possible TL sleep but my eyes hurt so I will try. Maybe listen to a podcast. I check my playlist. I see episode #2050 of Car Talk has posted. Yes! I will listen to this!
4:30 p.m. Another friend texts to check on me
4:40 p.m. Despite how tired I feel I can’t sleep. The teenager brings up my clean laundry and I hear chuckles and conversation from downstairs. Both teenagers are cleaning. I am starting to get cranky and bored. I guess I’ll watch more television. Maybe I should try and play a video game on my phone. My favorite comedian at the moment is Jim Breuer. He happens to be next on my YouTube list. (Jim Breuer “Playing with Kids.”)
4:45 p.m. the cockatoo is screaming at me
4:55 p.m. the friend who got me thinking about egg nog texts again
5:05 p.m. more random YouTube. I might be getting hungry.
5:30 p.m. M texts to check on me, inquiring about my oxygen stats. Asks about my fatigue and joints.
5:35 p.m. teenager two comes to ask if I have dirty dishes (I don’t) and makes me a fresh cup of tea
5:50 p.m. Gayle texts. The video I posted to YouTube earlier has reassured everyone that I am recovering.
6:15 p.m. suddenly remembered I never updated the bios for my foster kittens to post online
7:15 p.m. brief text with M— as he is a medical technologist I asked him if the virus starts by attacking the weaknesses I already had in my body. He replied that I have “an excellent understanding of virology.” I also realize that except for tired, I felt normal going down to make my dinner.
7: 20 p.m. my neighbor in the other half of my house texts. The Covid test she got yesterday since I made her coffee earlier this week came back negative. Lots of friends texting all at the same time.
7:25 p.m. teenager #1 comes to visit. She plays with Nala-bird.
7:35 p.m. a crash downstairs. Teenager goes to investigate— Vale goes with her.
7:40 p.m. Teenager brings Vale back. I think I hear my neighbor’s car. Nope. But apparently this is what I do now.
7:45 p.m. I think I might have hives. I’ve been noticing them all day but now I’m seeing them instead of feeling itchy. Suddenly I have a coughing fit.
Yesterday my doctor informed me that I have Covid-19, to read about the symptoms that led me to get a test you can review my blog entries from the last few days.
I’m too tired to rehash it all. I sleep a lot and lay it bed watching TV on my iPad. I don’t feel feverish, but I have trouble staying warm.
My main symptom is intense muscle aches and joint pain so getting up and moving is hard and exhausts me.
According to my doctor I can reenter the world and return to work December 21. My employer says I should wait until December 28.
So I woke up a little before 10 a.m. to this message from my doctor:
I was a little shocked to see it, but also relieved. If you’ve read my blog posts this week you’ll know that I’ve been experiencing a lot of intense symptoms. It was a difficult week or forgetting my medications (Covid brain fog?), not enough sleep (thank you to the gas company and their jackhammers) and symptoms easily explained by my cerebral palsy (muscle aches and joint pain) and status as a 40-something woman (frequent urination).
So at least with a positive Covid test, I no longer fear that my body has lost more of it’s functionality. I am relieved to be sick. I suppose other folks struggling with chronic ailments and disabilities understand.
My doctor will call in about two hours. I have some planning to do, with her advice. Meanwhile it is interesting to see everyone’s reactions.
Some people offer meals or groceries which can be left on the porch. Some people call to check on my symptoms. Others offer what got them through the illness. Others calculate when they saw me last and want tests. Others know they have been around me but will watch for symptoms to get tested.
I have hardly gotten out of bed today — I’m exhausted, my body is achy, my joints are locking up, I am lightheaded and my eyes burn.
This could be the ramifications of sleep deprivation and forgetting to take my allergy and blood pressure meds for two days. It could be a cold. But it could be Covid.
The teenager made authentic straight-from-the-box Shake N Bake chicken— which she thought was novel but paying $3.50 for a plastic bag and some breadcrumbs struck her as ridiculous.
On the other hand, the no bake confetti dessert I bought at the Grocery Outlet was scrumptious.
The animals, as they tend to do, noticed I didn’t feel well.
I called my doctor and they asked me to go for the Covid test at the hospital— there’s a drive through tent outside. Only 3 cars were in front of us. The attendent did a great job of swabbing my nose. Now if I have Covid, a doctor will call me Saturday. If I don’t, no one will contact me.
And of course I will need some sort of note to return to work.
And the two teens decorated the tree and to celebrate they started their 12 days of Christmas advent calendars a little early.
On Tuesday morning, I got up early and took the Norse Pride to the vet for a post-ringworm follow-up.
I forgot to take my medicine and vitamins. I have taken Zyrtec just about every day since this pandemic started. I am allergic to pollen, mold, dust, and just about everything else including cats.
During the coronavirus shut down I started taking my medication because spring was blossoming and I didn’t want people to think I had Covid.
Around the same time, my doctor had prescribed a low dose of Lexapro for my stress-induced high blood pressure.
So on Wednesday a.m., when I got home from work, I cuddled the animals and watched some more of the Crown. I got to bed a little after two.
Somewhere around 7:30 a.m., I heard the school bus. I rolled over to go back to sleep and — no exaggeration— a jackhammer started opening the street two doors from mine with a ferociousness that shook my house.
Thank you, UGI.
So five hours sleep.
And again because my routine is off I forgot to take my medicine.
I only picked 120 last night and I was terrified about the state of my health.
I was experiencing allergy symptoms (after all I now have 14 cats in my house), exhaustion, every muscle and joint in my body was aching. I couldn’t think. My forehead was sweating but my hands were cold. My hands and feet were tingling randomly as if they had fallen asleep.
I started the night strong with just about 40 fixes picked by first break, but at the end of the night even the ones that should have taken 15 minutes took me 30.
Every break my joints locked up and it took me time to get moving again without pain. And my numbers kept dropping.
I started to worry that maybe I had a fever and the nurse didn’t notice because I tend to have a low temperature. One thermometer earlier in the day said I was 94.5. That is impossible.
Luckily, I had some chili from a friend for dinner and a $2 latte from Dunkin.
Somehow I still managed to walk 24,000 steps but man— that brief episode of withdrawal scared me. A lot.
I came home and took all my vitamins and my medicine and slept about 7.5 hours. Hopefully that will put me on the mend.
Note: I found out later, these were Covid symptoms.
Firstly, my headline is misleading as it is Wednesday already.
Tonight my body aches. Everything hurts in a bad way. And I was dizzy and lightheaded— in a weird way, like my head was clogged with fluid and my body was dehydrated (which I am not).
I only “picked” 120 at Stitch Fix’s Bizzy Hizzy tonight and I am frustrated by that. That’s 2.5 carts less than last night which is almost an hour worth of work.
Now, mind you, I was working in W most of the night which is 750 steps from the “garage area” and if I hustle I can cross in 1 minute 30 seconds. But that adds 3 minutes per cart, which easily accounts for 45 minutes. If I follow my own logic, this means if I were stationed closer to the garage I might have easily reached 136, which would have pleased me.
Bizzy Hizzy
It is 1:30 a.m. now and I am continuing season 4 of The Crown. Now, considering how much my body hurts and the fact that my fingers and feet tingle as if they were asleep, something must be wrong with my circulation. Is my blood pressure too low?
So I thought I deserved a salty snack. The teenager had hijacked my new bag of tortilla chips, and left me with the stale broken crumbs in the cupboard. Her grandfather had brought potato chips but I didn’t see those in the cupboard.
But I found a cup of Little Caesar’s cheesy jalapeño dip and thought that could revive the stale chips.
And as soon as I got them to my room, foster kitten Loki spilled them. Onto my floor. I almost cried.
Speaking of The Norse Pride, here they are after their vet appointment declaring them free of ringworm. In this photo— believe it or not— they think they are hiding from the vacuum.
Tonight I listened to a podcast on Tudor fashion, the final segment of “Do Not Harm” on Wondery. I recommended it to one of my social work interns. I can’t wait to discuss it with her.
Earlier in the day, the teenager went with my father and found our Christmas tree and helped me have a steak dinner before work. I also took my homemade beef broth out of the crock pot and packaged it. I have a cheap man’s beef stroganoff planned for tomorrow.
It is 1:01 a.m. as I write this. There is a kitten at my left hip fascinated by the bubbles in my gin cocktail (gin and cherry vanilla seltzer), a small cockatoo on my knee and a pile of clean, folded laundry at the end of the bed that I have no intention of moving before I go to sleep.
Clean laundry
I had a really good shift at Stitch Fix’s Bizzy Hizzy. I’m a tad bummed because I had hoped to “pick” 140 or more fixes and I only hit 135.
Working as a picker in the warehouse is like being an athlete training for a marathon— I love the challenge of trying to increase my performance every day.
It’s using muscles in my lower body that haven’t ever experienced activity like this. I spent 10 years on my feet and doing labor at Target, but this doesn’t feel like work.
It feels like a game.
My total number of steps for yesterday was around 24,500. It feels good.
It has been ages since I had a weekend that felt like a weekend. A weekend without trying to catch up on chores. A weekend without “Sunday scaries.” A weekend without working overtime or getting up early for one thing or another.
As a matter of fact, I slept until 11 this morning, which, when you consider my new bedtime is between 1 and 2 a.m., is not unreasonable.
The teenager made me coffee and brought me a pain au chocolat from Lidl (which is still too soft and not crispy, flaky enough to remind me of real French croissant but far better and cheaper than most American attempts).
I spent some time with my cockatoo, Nala, and many cats and kittens not to mention with my daughter.
Speaking of Nala, she bit my phone screen protector and I’m not sure if she got a shard of glass in the camera or she broke the lens, but my selfies are hazy now.
Teenager #1 wanted to drive today so we ended up at Shoprite, Pet Valu and Starbucks. I haven’t had a Starbucks in ages and I decided to try the Nitro Sweet Cream Cold Brew but ended up a tad distraught that apparently Nitro does not come with ice cubes. It’s room temperature-ness did not appeal to me.
We found lots of goodies at Pet Valu with their going out of business sale— exotic canned cat food, a myriad of treats, lots of parakeet food and a little something for Sobaka for Christmas.
I received an AmEx offer spend $15 at Sonic get $5 back so we went, as Sonic is one of the teenager’s favorite places. The food was kind of awful and they only have the drive thru open so they misheard our order so our total after tax was $15.23. I probably won’t get my special offer.
Teen with mocha cookie crumble frap
Nitro cold brew and olive feta salad from ShopRite
We ran into one of our favorite couples at ShopRite— We’ll name them C&F. They both have much respect from my daughter and I because they are super intelligent, easy going people who found each other and “overcame” some life obstacles that I pretty much would label as the realities of our American society. I feel like if they were ever two people who earned every success in life it was C&F, and I am so lucky to have met them and have them in my life and so proud of their children and commend them for being great parents. And to think— I have known C since before she got married! They were a little shocked to hear the teenager can drive since we all met when she was six.
Anyway. So after all that and a meal at Sonic, the teenager and I came home. She put the groceries away. We wrapped some holiday gifts. And finished our hair.
Amazing in Lavender
And then while I did laundry— I have surrendered to the idea that laundry will never be “caught up” again in this house— she started construction of the holiday village.
Angel Ackerman 